Erotic Cyn for your senses

Yesterday I received the results of my vaginal biopsy. I had a hysterectomy in the spring of this year, followed by a Pap Smear six months later. That test came back abnormal which meant I needed a biopsy to determine what was happening. I admit, after my mom dying of lung cancer and my male’s sister fighting and beating breast cancer, I really didn’t want it to be anything serious. Our families have been through enough the past few years. Yet, I was informed that I have precancer. This means, left untreated– it will become cancer– and not in years, but in months.

There are scores of feelings and other things running through my mind right now- some good and some bad. Part of me worries on the treatment because they basically must treat this to being similar to cancer- there is no other way to treat it. That scares me- there’s no way around it. Luckily the type of precancer I have is fairly slow growing. It means I’ve got months to worry before it becomes cancerous. I realize that doesn’t sound good since in some instances that it can take years to develop. With vaginal tissue, the time frame is shorter due to the thinness of the area and because of the possibility to spreading to other areas. Of course, I’m dealing with the past of my family which is scary because everything happened at this time of year.

Overall, I’m adapting and I’m learning to accept what’s going on. I’ll be able to handle more once I know what the plan of action is, what the side effects are and how I need to handle the day to day stuff as I handle the after-effects. I am honoured by having good friends and family who are by my side and are keeping me going as I handle these things that have hit me this year. Without them, I’d have crumbled and faded away. But now I need to reflect upon the truth of the Celtic New Year and what I need to get rid of in my life and what I need to work on. Things are going to be slower for me now. I’m not the fast writer of the past, but a slower, richer writer now. I’m relearning how to outdo my ADD and how to handle the challenges thrown my way this year physically. But I’m still losing weight, I’m still trying to exercise. The hard part now is learning how to integrate things so nothing gets left behind– just rotated in turn.

This week you can find me at Selena Illyria’s blog. Why? I’m guest hosting a whole week of BDSM. *grins* That’s right– me, BDSM and many BDSM authors. Glory at it’s finest! How can you get there from here?

Selena’s Website

Click the link and come join in on the fun!

Today has been a major posting day. Sometimes, you get news hitting you on all sides, other days there’s nothing. But right now, I’m mad and I’m upset. More importantly, I’m furious at Sonoma County, California for what they’ve done. Many of you know about how Prop 8 is being fought at many levels in California. But at a ground level, it comes down to two elderly men in love, doing all the legal things they’re supposed to do– and being screwed over by the county officials because they didn’t want to deal with the truth. To read more– follow the link to ARe. Take a stand today. Tell people it’s not right to hurt anyone– young or old just because they love someone. It’s just not right.

It’s been a while, but I’ve also been thinking on this topic for a while. There are people out there with slower sex drives then us sexual maniacs- and we often are with them because there’s a bond. Before, I spoke about how people with the higher drive can do things to help relieve the tension and pressure on those with the slower drives. This time, I’m reversing the process and explaining the needs of those with higher drives and the impact on them. More »

Today’s question was sent to me and I have to admit, it’s a good one because it deals with some concepts that used interchangably with others. So onto this week’s question.

Mistress Cynnara- What is a fetish? Do you have to have one to be kinky or sexy? — Fetishist in the Making, I think More »

This week’s topic is about rough sex. It’s been a popular one with both men and women. Sometimes, it’s good to fuck and fuck hard. But many people wonder about the physics of rough sex and how to do it so it doesn’t hurt too much. So, we’re going to cover some ideas on how to roughen up your sex life without being sore for a week afterwards. More »

Recently, someone asked me a question and I realized that it needed to be answered not just to her, but here on my site as well. 

Mistress Cynnara, my boyfriend wants me to dominate him, but because he’s younger, thinner, etc etc, I find it hard to dominate him like I think he wants. How does one dominate another? — Dominew More »

Today, it’s all about quickies. Some are spur of the moment fuck fests. Some are well planned out for that one moment when you only have a few minutes. Sometimes quickies are the thoughts of one person wanting to do something that the other person will enjoy but will reject if given a chance because it might bring them more pleasure than the other person. Whatever the reason, today’s topic is about the quickie and how to make it work for you! More »

Today is a bit special for me. Something happened to me yesterday and I realized I needed to speak on it for all those people who might think that fantasies are nothing but imagination. Yesterday, my male fulfilled one of my biggest fantasies dealing with him. He’s known about this fantasy for a while now, but though he liked having his fantasies fulfilled, he wasn’t sure how I’d feel if I couldn’t have my whole fantasy given to me. More »

Today, we step a bit into my other realm- that of writing. In fact, as I’ve done some shopping today (I bought a new lightweight flogger and some lovely erotic BDSM oriented ebooks from Changeling Press), I realized it’s something I’ve not touched upon much in this area. I think it’s time for me to address the idea of the erotic written word and what it can do for both sexes. More »